I get chills every time I listen to this song…and I’ve been listening to it consistently for over 15 years. I figured that it was high time to go old school after introducing several newer songs over the last couple of weeks. In addition to heading back to the past, we are heading back to the loud and the declarative.
Stavesacre was a Christian hard rock band throughout the late 90’s and 00’s. The lead singer and songwriter, Mark Solomon, had also spearheaded the ground-breaking hardcore/punk group, The Crucified, before experiencing a crisis of faith and a time away from the limelight. His return to the cross and to the stage produced the band Stavesacre and this song, which is a personal reflection on the goodness of God to restore him.
At the Moment: With a sigh I greet the day, I feel the morning on my face,
weary at the moment I awake,
even as i lie the thought returns to mind,
“Welcome to the rest of your life.”
Somewhere I’ve lost my way from saved to stray and failing,
in silence my spirit pleads,
“Is the vision lost or has it been passed on?
Is there any use continuing?”
My soul will wait, my soul waits silently
for God, my God (God my refuge)
and I will live and know some destiny
still waits for me.
His faithfulness, my hope
it brings comfort to my soul
with a still small voice whispering,
“Call upon My name and I will set you up on high,
be still and know that I am God.”
Creation speaks to me , I’m stricken to my knees in reverence and fear,
forever my Almighty, the heavens in Your hand surpass the grains of sand.
Who am I before you?
elieonai eli adullam [God my father, God my refuge]
This song is a great example of showing the human process of going from a conflict full of questions and fears to a solution full of hope and peace. Solomon truly screams from the heart on this one as he recounts his own wayward journey that found its way back to the grace of Abba, Father!
The Psalms capture this format quite often, as well. David and other biblical writers share in prose and meter their own journeys of trial to triumph, scorn to salvation, the depths of hell to the heights of the heavens. Psalm 73 is a perfect example. Asaph begins with confessing his precarious position of falling away from God because of the oppression of enemies around him. He lambasts God with questions and complaints while he searches in the dark for answers and footholds.
Only after God mercifully leads him to His very presence in the sanctuary does the blindness of pride and sin disappear. He sees things as they really are. And what he sees is that God is everything. Our song selection arrives at the very same conclusion, which is summed beautifully in these verses (Psalm 73:25-28):
“Whom have I in heaven but You? I desire You more than anything on earth. My health may fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart; He is mine forever. Those who desert Him will perish, for You destroy those who abandon You. But as for me, how good it is to be near God! I have made the Sovereign Lord my shelter, and I will tell everyone about the wonderful things You do.”
Throughout history, time and again, people have been writing songs like this. God shows up when we are still and listen. God shows up when we seek Him in His house. God shows up when lay aside our self-centeredness and worldly-mindedness. And when He does “show up”, you can be sure that He is all that you ever needed or wanted.
At the moment, you may be doubting these truths or afraid that you are the exception to the grace of God. Listen to the sound of tens of thousands of years and millions of testimonies, my friend. This is the moment that God awaits for you to embrace Him as He is, for He will always do the same for you…and rest assured that you will be saved, satisfied and saturated with His love. The true believer in Jesus Christ can take a tune like this one and cry out with joy and freedom from deep within their gut – knowing that God is Father and Refuge – even from ourselves! (kinda makes you glad that it’s a loud song, right?)